Reward Notice Copyright © 2008 by: Green Fingered Skinner

Reward

I hereby and herein offer a reward payable to anyone for the safe return of my husband of thirty years, Carl Robert Frederick, chairperson of the Department of English, Punxinkle Cove College of the Humanities, Punxinkle Cove, Delaware. 

Carl, you old fool, where are you hiding this time?

Last seen late last Friday night at the Hoist A Few Pub on Main Street in downtown Farmington, Delaware, eyewitnesses claim Professor Frederick appeared to be having a goodtime playing drinking games, with a group of zany freshman co-eds. 

The elderly reprobate has done this before.  The most recent episode of old…

Lucifer’s Crown

Inspired By True Events…

There was silence when the boy was hung.  First the monkey, then the boy.  Though whether the boy was as guilty as the monkey – of course, there had been some debate.  But as the monkey had singled out the boy during the trial, the judges had no choice but to hang them both.  Yes, that’s justice for you!

Yet whether the silence that ensued was because Molly Thirkettle had just hitched up her skirts (revealing a very sordid sight indeed) or due to the comet that tore through the sky (which was always a portent of bad…

Pidgeon English

Pigeon English. Words 630

The American tourist placed a well-manicured finger on the map. ‘We’re here, honey, a village called Thay – Den – Bois.’ He took his wife’s arm. ‘There must be a pub around. Every English village has a public house.’

‘And a market place,’ his wife said, as she put the last morsel of a meat pie between her lips and licked her fingers. ‘I guess it’s not hygienic buying food off a stall, but I was starving and that meat pie sure tasted good.’

They meandered along Main Street, a combination of cottages with a few shops…

Almost

1
Jack walked out of the store, his rope handled plastic bag in hand.  He was a tall, thick-legged man with a graying goatee and swollen feet that sagged over the sides of his sandals, his pale sausage toes suffering from a lack of oxygen.  He shuffled, the sound of his sandals dragging against the tile audible over the piped in classical music from the mall’s speakers.
Jack turned his attention to the windows, each passing store brought on new things to want, like flipping through the glossy pages of a catalog, complete with bra and panty section.  Thank you…