Posted: 12 December 2006 03:13 AM   [ Ignore ]
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I read an article in the paper, about a tragic murder.

I was first sad, then mad, then I wasn’t sure how to feel.

A lady was found at dawn, naked, in a parking lot. She had been—stabbed? hit? the article didn’t specify—and was in pretty bad shape, but she was conscious. She couldn’t talk. She died an hour later, at the hospital, without giving anyone any information about what had happened to her.

I feel much despair for this poor woman. I imagine her lying there, alone, in the dark, for hours in the cold, conscious, holding on to the faint hope that someone will come and find her, that everything will be allright, that she’ll be able to tell them who did this to her.

And help does come, but for her, it’s too late, and by that time she probably knows it. To have suffered in silence even when she was safe and being cared for, and then to slip away after all…

It inspired me to write about the internal monologue someone in this situation may experience. I wanted to honour this victim, all victims. I wanted to give her the voice she could not find on that cold morning. I may have given her feelings she didn’t have, I may have spoken a mind she didn’t know, but at least I have tried to give her (or myself) some hope that not everyone will dismiss her story as tomorrow’s headlines make their way to Sunday morning brunch.

NOTE: Although this short story was inspired by true events, its contents, thoughts and characters are purely fictional.

Please let me know what you think.

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Posted: 12 December 2006 10:04 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]
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Not for me

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Posted: 12 December 2006 01:11 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 2 ]
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Your shortstory ‘Speechless at Dawn’ was so very poignant and loaded with feeling that it made me cry. I was a bit afraid when you mentioned the kind of subject you were going to tangle, but you pulled it off with a lot of class and I give you major kudos for that.
Awsome read!

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“Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.”
- Victor Hugo

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Posted: 12 December 2006 09:59 PM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 3 ]
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Thanks, Flute. Your comments mean a lot to me.

I think I wrote the story mainly because I was deeply saddened by the news.
Because this was the only way I knew to deal with the pain I felt.
I know this isn’t an easy subject, nor an easy story to read. It was tough to write, as well. I didn’t want it to be a horror story. I couldn’t help but make it a sad one, but I wanted to tie some hope to it. And yes, some dignity.

Thank you for seeing all of that. It really does mean a lot to me.

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Posted: 15 December 2006 01:58 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 4 ]
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Wow.  Like Munch’s “The Scream”, it’s not exactly pleasant (you wouldn’t hang “The Scream” in your kitchen, normally), but it’s definitely good art about real life.  I have a feeling I will remember this story next time I read something rotten in the paper, or traipse alone through a deserted parking lot.

You’ve done a beautiful job of speaking for others who can’t speak for themselves.

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Posted: 15 December 2006 02:08 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 5 ]
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No, indeed, not kitchen material smile

Thanks Julianyway, you’ve just made my writing the story worthwile. Not forgetting is a big part of learning to build a better world. Hopefully this will help ensure that more people can keep their voice in the future. Maybe it’ll help others find it.

Thanks again for the comment.

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Posted: 15 December 2006 02:39 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 6 ]
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si philbrook - 12 December 2006 02:04 PM

Not for me

Hi Si,

I appreciate you letting me know how you feel about the story.

I’ve been curious about your input - care to expand?

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Posted: 12 February 2007 05:50 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 7 ]
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This is a very poignant story.  The suspense never lets up, and the ending is fitting.  And the writing style fits perfectly.  I don’t have any difficulty believing that these thoughts may have coursed through the poor woman’s consciousness in real life.  I like this story very, very much. grin

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