Thursday, November 23, 2006

Feline tokens

Category: Poetry/Lyrics
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Old Comments

  • I like the idea of this poem, but I have some technical difficulties with it.  The ‘still’ in “its fate is sealed, still tries to get away” is redundant and also interferes with the meter (as I read it).

    When I write, I usually leave it for a while, even if I think it’s perfect.  Later, I try to determine if changes can make it better.  The first part, when I write it initially, usually goes pretty quickly, and then, depending on how I feel about it when I get back to it again, I might revise it several times before finally deciding to either abandon it or post it.

    Sometimes I worry that my revisions might do more harm than good.  I used to write something and post it right away, and I guess your poems seem a little like that - like they could use some attention from you.  On the other hand, sometimes the purity of the virgin incarnation should be left alone.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  11/25  at  02:46 PM
  • I feel the feline in this one.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  12/06  at  01:41 AM
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