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Sunday, May 14, 2006

Hot Chocolate

Category: Short Story
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Old Comments

  • I like being disturbed.  Thanks!

    There is an element of this theme that I like to see but is mostly missing from your piece:  The motivation of the victims - vigilanties - to pick up what we have relegated to the cruel, wasteful, inefficient social conscience called government.  If the sense that the government has to do something about this kind of person were eliminated or just diminished, people would care more and put more effort into identifying such people and protecting each other from them.  But if you read a lot of what I write, you’ll see I’m grinding an axe.  It’s an important axe to me; what can I say?

    Typos:
    “bring lead” in 1st paragraph.  “staring” in fourth paragraph.  Click on either ‘permalink’ at the bottom of “Hot Chocolate” on the right and you’ll get an “Edit This Piece” link at the bottom.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  05/14  at  11:00 PM
  • Dave
    Thank’s for pointing out the typos. Y’know, I really hadn’t considered the victims point of view in this piece. I wrote it on a whim, and never thought about it that deeply. It’s not a very deep piece of writing, It’s just a piece from a disturbed guy’s point of view.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  05/15  at  12:25 AM
  • HOWEVER… If you’d like to read something from a pissed off victims perspective, I’ve got a story that is tentatively scheduled to be published on 99burning that you might like to read. I’m not sure when it hits the interntet airwaves, ask Don, but when it comes out, gimme some feedback.

    Campbell

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  05/15  at  12:28 AM
  • As a matter of fact, I am responsible for posting 99Burning magazine to the Internet, so I will definitely read your 99Burning story.  I’m looking forward to it.

    Don does networking and writing and I do software, website stuff, and feedback here at Litmocracy.

    Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)  on  05/15  at  02:29 AM
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