Sunday, February 28, 2010

I will not join AARP!

Category: Issue 17

The man,
The man,
Direct marketing man
came to me when I turned fifty.
He said, I have a thing that’s nifty.

In the mail,
every day,
direct marketing man comes to say
You really really want to be
a member of AARP.

No, I say,
can’t you see,
I will not join

Will you join
to buy insurance?
He keeps after me
past all endurance.

I will not join
for an insurance plan.
I will not join,
Direct Marketing Man!

Will you join
to get discounts,
you’ll save money
in all amounts.

I will not join
to get discounts,
I do not want them, let me be,
I will not join AARP!

Will you join
for a magazine,
with words and pictures,
it’s really keen!

I will not join
for a magazine,
I will not, can not,
by now you see,
I will not join

Will you join on the web?
Will you join in the month of Feb.?
Will you join in the mail?
Will you join or will you fail?

I will not join on the web,
I will not join in the month of Feb.
Stop sending letters,
stop asking me,
I will not join AARP!

Oh, you will join,
we will have your ass,
after a few more years
have passed.

I will not join
at sixty five,
I will not join while I’m
Besides, I’m poor,
I can’t pay your fee,
I have no money to
join AARP.

Never mind then,
says Direct Marketing Man,
you don’t fit our business plan,
which is to suck lots of cash
from older people’s lifelong stash.
If you think you can join for free,
we don’t want you in





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